Health & Fitness
Confessions of a Mean Mommy
Somewhere between the Tiger Moms and the French ladies who are Bringing Up Bebe stand members of the Mean Mommies club, who believe that rules and accountability help create good kids.
When some friends and I formed a new book club a few years ago, we learned the local bookstore would give us a discount if we registered our club and its monthly selections. We discussed potential club names, and realized that “MeanestMommies” was perfect, as that’s what we’re all called at home.
It turns out that our club name and no-nonsense parenting style was part of a trend, a reaction against the coddling, cheer-leading, here’s-a-trophy-for-joining-the-team method that was popular when our kids were younger.
In the past few years, a host of mean mommy blogs – includingthemeanestmom.blogspot.com and www.meanestmommy.com — have popped up, all flaunting the same, “I’m not supposed to be your friend, I’m supposed to teach you how to be an honest, hard-working contributor to society” bent.
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In my view, this “mean mommy” approach to parenting fills a nice void between the hyper-controlling helicopter moms, the super-driven Tiger Moms and the latest flavor of the month, the detached, extra-strict French style presented in Pamela Druckerman’s new Bringing Up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting.
In our house, the meanest mommy in the world makes the kids complete 10 tasks a day to earn allowance (make their beds, clear their plates, put their clothes in the laundry and, most important, take on one job that contributes to the household’s functioning, such as emptying the dishwasher or folding laundry).
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Early on, this mean mommy was inspired by a wonderful book entitled Mitten Strings for God (it isn’t as religiously oriented as it sounds), in which the author’s edicts include a ban on criticizing “the chef.” In that woman’s home, as in mine, if the kids don’t like what’s offered for dinner, after trying everything, they can quietly leave the table, grab two slices of bread and some cheese, and return with that simple sandwich.
To read more about the author's super-mean parenting stragies and inspiration, please click here for the entire Permission Slips post. Carol Gullstad and I alternate updating our blog each week.